Saturday, June 30, 2012

He's Still Working on Me

I've wanted to start a blog for a long time.  In fact, I actually have started one before.  More than one, to be honest.  But, something always happened.  I'm not sure if I just lost focus or interest or what exactly.  I think a big part of the problem was finding the right thing to write about.

You see, I love blogs.  I have several that I read pretty regularly and I love finding great new blog posts, too.  I've learned a lot from blogs.  I admire the women who write them.  But, they also often leave me feeling inadequate.  These people - these bloggers - seem to have it all together!  They write about the great meals they made, the wonderful crafts they did with their kids, the amazingly perfect new organizational system they created.  I know they are just people like me.  But, from this side of the web, they look perfect - they set a standard I'll never reach.

As a result, even though I love to write and I love blogs, I've had a hard time coming up with something to write about.  Because I often don't feel like I measure up to these wonderful women whose blogs I follow.

Then, I realized that it isn't about that.  Sure, I'm not a huge fan of cooking and would just as soon make something prepackaged (gasp!).  Sure, my house is almost always a mess and my kids are lucky if they can even find a glue stick that isn't dried out and shriveled up half the time.  But, that's true for a lot of people!  That doesn't mean I don't have great ideas or thoughts worth sharing.  It just means I have some stuff I'm still working on.  Or, more accurately, God is working on in me. 

You see, that is what this is really about.  I'm a work in progress.  Some days I do better than others, but overall I think I'm improving as a person.  I'm becoming a better mother, a better wife, a better homemaker, and a better child of the King.  I finally realized that this is what I wanted to write about: my journey.  The ups and the downs.  My successes and my failures.  Which means being completely honest with myself and with my imaginary readers.

This realization came to me through a simple children's song that I sang in Sunday school many years ago and my kids sing now:

He's Still Working on Me

He's still working on me
To make me what I need to be
It took him just a week to make the moon and stars
The sun and the Earth and Jupiter and Mars
How loving and patient He must be
'Cause He's still workin' on me

There really ought to be a sign upon my heart
Don't judge me yet, there's an unfinished part
But I'll be better just according to His plan
Fashioned by the Master's loving hands

He's still working on me
To make me what I need to be
It took him just a week to make the moon and stars
The sun and the Earth and Jupiter and Mars
How loving and patient He must be
'Cause He's still workin' on me
In the mirror of His word
Reflections that I see
Makes me wonder why He never gave up on me
But He loves me as I am and helps me when I pray
Remember He's the potter; I'm the clay 

 He's still working on me
To make me what I need to be
It took him just a week to make the moon and stars
The sun and the Earth and Jupiter and Mars
How loving and patient He must be
'Cause He's still workin' on me 

I hope that eventually I might get a few readers who join me on this journey.  But, even if I never do, I'm going to keep at this.  I'll be writing about my life and everything in it.   The one unifying theme is my goal to be who He wants me to be.